To the man I love, Happy Birthday

Every mom has a birth story, the one about the day their baby was born. Justin’s mom isn’t here to tell his, and she’s the only one who really could tell it in detail, recounting the feelings of the moment, 32 years ago, when her first baby was born.

But I’ve seen his baby book. I’ve read her journal from the year that he was born. And one thing I know for sure-- he was a miracle to her. She loved him so much. No matter what happened the day after or the week after or for the rest of his life, on this day 32 years ago he was the most special baby every born.

She doesn’t get to be here, either, to tell him happy birthday or how proud she is of the way he turned out. I know she is proud though. She would tell him that he grew into a man of integrity, of compassion, someone dependable and trustworthy and loving and considerate. She would tell him how proud she is that he’s come so far and made a successful life for himself and his family. She would dote on the grand-babies he’s given her and be so excited for the one still to come this year, his son that will carry on his family name. She would tell him that she loves him more than anything and that even as a grown-up man he will always be her baby.

I know this because she wrote down everything about him in her journals--the things he could say when he learned to speak, how soon he rolled over, how he looked when he laughed. She wrote down every detail-- songs he could sing, his sleep habits, how very smart he was even from a tiny baby. Every time he had a birthday party she wrote down the name of every single guest, what presents they brought, and how much fun he had. She kept track of the little things-- how he rocked himself to sleep on his hands and knees as a baby, and how he knew the words to every single commercial jingle he’d ever seen, and could sing them perfectly in tune and timing.

It doesn’t take a mom to tell you how special you are, but it does mean a lot to hear it from that one person. She didn’t get to be here long but while she was alive she gave the world an incredible person, and made sure he grew up with the best character traits and the best heart. The world would be an awful place without him.

I thank her, my mother in law Annette Denise Watson, a woman I only got to meet very briefly, in passing, many years ago. I thank her for bringing Justin into the world, my soul mate, my best friend. I thank her for helping him grow into a man I want to have children with, and a man I want my children to grow up to be like. Thank you, Mom. You did well. I love you, Justin David Wixom. With all my heart, for the rest of my life and beyond, as long as I am capable of it. Happy Birthday.